Stop pushing! You’re making it worse!

Are you making things harder for yourself than necessary? Sometimes all our efforts to move forwards are actually counterproductive, and are in fact making things worse.  It could be that you’ve effectively created a ball and chain attached to your ankle, rather than the amazing future you want.  If you’re fed up of being stuck, read on…

In our western society, we are taught that action is the way to go – that if you want change, you need to set goals, make plans, and then take action.

All of this is, of course, absolutely true, and without goals, plans and actions nothing will happen.  However, there’s another side to the coin that we often forget….

There’s a universal law that the more you push something the more resistance you get back – remember your school physics lessons?  This works in subtle energetic terms as well as the physics lesson.

You might already know that I started off my career as a conventional physical scientist – life is a strange and mysterious thing  – and I mean conventional…..scanning electron microscopes, metallurgical grinding machines, mechanical testing machines, lecture theatres, research proposals, the works!   Goodness that was a long time ago!

You’d have thought with such a background that I might have had some clue about this and could avoid this mistake.  Alas, if I’m honest I was probably the worst example of this in the whole history of creation….or at least nearly the worst.

Here’s the problem.  Say we want a particular change in our lives – to get a new job, new relationship, release a health problem – we set our goal and start using all our holistic and energetic techniques to get that change.  We do the affirmations, clear the blocks, visualise our future self, run our healing energies, as well as taking the physical actions needed to get our results.  Sounds perfect.

HOWEVER, here’s the issue. If you don’t see results immediately, you think you’re not trying hard enough, so you redouble your efforts.  You start pushing very hard in one direction and the resistance kicks in.  Basically, when you push too much, you lock the whole thing up and nothing moves.  You feel stuck and frustrated.  So you push harder.  And, you know what, when you push harder you make it even worse.  What you create is a never-ending vicious cycle or self-sabotage.  Result – only more frustration.

If you want to truly co-create a different future with the universe, you need to give the universe room to move and do its magic.  When we are busy pushing in one direction we are imposing our rigid specifications for the result, the timescale and they way it is going to come about.  This is limited by our life experience, and what our brain can imagine.  If we impose these things on the energetic process, we may very well be shutting down the creation process altogether!   Always remember that the universe has infinite parameters to work with, infinitely more than our little human brains.  What if the universe had something 10 times better in store for us, but because if was coming to us via a different route we block that energy unwittingly? If we impose our plan and insist upon it, we can miss that opportunity and get nothing.

It took me a very long time to learn that lesson and I’ll admit it’s still a challenge to let go and allow things to flow, but I’m much better than I used to be.


The key to co-creating the future you really want is to stop pushing.  Yes, set your goals, and take action, but at the same time think about easing off the pressure.  Throw your desires and goals out into the universe, and then imagine everything you need flowing to you: the help, the resources, the inspiration, the opportunities the contacts or whatever else is required. Then be open for however the universe provides.

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